i'm guessing your mother isn't used to direct honest communication what with living with your Dad so it's maybe hard for her to hear it and not be looking for hidden messages and power-games. Specially when although it's an entirely reasonable (and sensible) thing for you to say it could feel a bit rejecting to a person in a bad-head-place. (i'm assuming you were already doing stuff like using i-statements to make it more gentle and hearable) A thing that's sometimes worked for me is to (slowly and gently) physically remove myself - so i your case i guess i'd have started doing my bedtime routine and if she stayed around have eventual acttly have gone to bed leaving her to choose stay in other parts of your house doing clearing etc without you to argue with or take herself home
no subject
i'm guessing your mother isn't used to direct honest communication what with living with your Dad so it's maybe hard for her to hear it and not be looking for hidden messages and power-games. Specially when although it's an entirely reasonable (and sensible) thing for you to say it could feel a bit rejecting to a person in a bad-head-place. (i'm assuming you were already doing stuff like using i-statements to make it more gentle and hearable)
A thing that's sometimes worked for me is to (slowly and gently) physically remove myself - so i your case i guess i'd have started doing my bedtime routine and if she stayed around have eventual acttly have gone to bed leaving her to choose stay in other parts of your house doing clearing etc without you to argue with or take herself home