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My brain gets on my nerves.
May. 1st, 2002 07:02 amI have a problem - an addiction. It's not particularly harmful - whilst it can cause accident or injury when indulged at the wrong tme, it's unlikely to cause any lasting damage to internal organs. You see, I am addicted to words.
All day long, I am assailed by Words which need to be read. In my waking hours, I read all day long. At home I read the newspaper, email, livejournals, other web sites... I actually read very few books because I'm too busy reading everything else. If it has Words on it, I'll read it. I just can't help it.
Now, this in itself, whilst a major addiction, is only a minor problem. After all, most things only have words on the outside - it's only dangerous things like books and magazines that are full of words, and they can be easily avoided. No, the problem is that I don't have much time to think during the day because I'm too busy reading what everyone else is thinking. Oh, of course I think about what they've written, but then there's someone else's journal entry and I have to read that, and then there's something else... So the only time I actually stop and Think is when I'm not reading. Which only occurs during three events:
1) When I'm in the bath
2) When I'm cooking
3) When I'm lying in bed trying to get to sleep.
This means that whenever I do one of these things, with no Words to distract me, I'm prone to being overwhelmed by Thoughts that come flying in from all angles. When cooking or cleaning, that's not too much of a problem - I can always stop and note down any interesting ideas that turn up. But when I'm trying to get to sleep - now that's annoying. There I am trying to wind down my brain so that I can fall asleep, and it's gone into overdrive - new ideas come bubbling up every few seconds. In particular, I find myself writing hundreds of things that would become livejournal entries if I could be bothered to actually write them.
And then I wonder why I'm an insomniac.
All day long, I am assailed by Words which need to be read. In my waking hours, I read all day long. At home I read the newspaper, email, livejournals, other web sites... I actually read very few books because I'm too busy reading everything else. If it has Words on it, I'll read it. I just can't help it.
Now, this in itself, whilst a major addiction, is only a minor problem. After all, most things only have words on the outside - it's only dangerous things like books and magazines that are full of words, and they can be easily avoided. No, the problem is that I don't have much time to think during the day because I'm too busy reading what everyone else is thinking. Oh, of course I think about what they've written, but then there's someone else's journal entry and I have to read that, and then there's something else... So the only time I actually stop and Think is when I'm not reading. Which only occurs during three events:
1) When I'm in the bath
2) When I'm cooking
3) When I'm lying in bed trying to get to sleep.
This means that whenever I do one of these things, with no Words to distract me, I'm prone to being overwhelmed by Thoughts that come flying in from all angles. When cooking or cleaning, that's not too much of a problem - I can always stop and note down any interesting ideas that turn up. But when I'm trying to get to sleep - now that's annoying. There I am trying to wind down my brain so that I can fall asleep, and it's gone into overdrive - new ideas come bubbling up every few seconds. In particular, I find myself writing hundreds of things that would become livejournal entries if I could be bothered to actually write them.
And then I wonder why I'm an insomniac.
