tired. frustrated. argh!

Someone posted on chronic_health "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired". And that's pretty much how I feel today.

For the past, oooh, month? I've been tired all the time. It gets draining after a while. I go to bed tired and wake up exhausted. I have so many nightmares (maybe 8 or 9 that I remember each night, plus some more that I won't remember later) that I wake up constantly and so I'm exhausted in the morning. When this latest bout of depression first started I could go to sleep in the middle of the day and sleep off the depression, waking up feeling slightly better, whereas now I can't get to sleep at night, and when I do it's nightmares, nightmares, nightmares *sigh*. I'm shattered, really. And it's awful to be lying in bed knowing that when I do fall asleep I'm going to have bad dreams - that in itself would be enough to give someone insomnia.

And now irc friends of mine in a timezone five hours behind have started logging off to go to bed, and I'm still here, still awake but oh so tired, and naggingly depressed, wanting a hug and with nowhere to get one apart from one of my octys. I'm sick of this.

*distracted*

I am distracted. I was all ready to write a long rant denouncing my bank for being Evil and sending me a sarky letter about being overdrawn when there's just been a weekend and two Bank Holidays, stopping me from being able to put any money into my account, and how I put some money in on Saturday and it's not my fault it won't go through until today, but then I read the letter and discovered it was about something entirely different. So now I'm feeling frustrated and annoyed with my bank for not giving me an excuse to slag them off.

So I'll moan about the weather instead. Crap, isn't it - at least in London?!

still *distracted*

Yesterday's User Friendly was hilarious, at least to octopus fans.

Bah, I hate feeling like this, not being able to settle down or concentrate, being all jittery. In a way it's worse than being depressed because at least then you know how you're going to feel for the next few hours, whereas right now I can't even predict how I'm going to feel in the next few minutes. And the big mood crash that'll follow will be fun too...