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Jul. 20th, 2001 04:27 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
baratronWow.
Apparently, someone on LiveJournal posted a suicide note to her journal, then attempted suicide in front of her webcam. Somehow this made the national news in the USA.
I won't post a link to the diary of the person concerned (most of the really worrying stuff has been made friends-only anyway), and I won't post a link to any of the news sites with the story on because apparently they all got major facts wrong, but wow - that really puts my problems into perspective.
I've been very tired the past couple of days, sleeping for 15 or 16 hours a day. I think the weather doesn't help. Since Saturday it's been grey and drizzly here, whereas before that we had a couple of
weeks of brilliant sunshine. I'm inclined towards something like seasonal affective disorder, where bad weather really affects my mood, so the complete lack of sunshine in the past week hasn't helped me at all. Still, I'm looking forward to the weekend. Barring complete exhaustion, I should be going to the Liquid Lounge tomorrow, and I've got a karaoke party on Saturday. Also, Eddy came round yesterday and he mentioned that Funland has a new game which is like Dancing Stage only with hand movements. I asked if it was Para Para Paradise, but he couldn't remember the name. So we'll definitely have to investigate that.
Apparently, someone on LiveJournal posted a suicide note to her journal, then attempted suicide in front of her webcam. Somehow this made the national news in the USA.
I won't post a link to the diary of the person concerned (most of the really worrying stuff has been made friends-only anyway), and I won't post a link to any of the news sites with the story on because apparently they all got major facts wrong, but wow - that really puts my problems into perspective.
I've been very tired the past couple of days, sleeping for 15 or 16 hours a day. I think the weather doesn't help. Since Saturday it's been grey and drizzly here, whereas before that we had a couple of
weeks of brilliant sunshine. I'm inclined towards something like seasonal affective disorder, where bad weather really affects my mood, so the complete lack of sunshine in the past week hasn't helped me at all. Still, I'm looking forward to the weekend. Barring complete exhaustion, I should be going to the Liquid Lounge tomorrow, and I've got a karaoke party on Saturday. Also, Eddy came round yesterday and he mentioned that Funland has a new game which is like Dancing Stage only with hand movements. I asked if it was Para Para Paradise, but he couldn't remember the name. So we'll definitely have to investigate that.
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Re: good while it lasted
Date: 2001-07-26 04:19 am (UTC)At the end of the day, if you are serious about killing yourself, you don't put it on a webcam for people to see, death is not pretty and you don't want to inflict that on your friends.
Many years ago, I made a plan. I still keep this plan in the back of my head, in case life ever gets too dire... but for life to be dire enough that I'd put the plan into action, I'd have to - oh, say, have an inoperable brain tumour, or have had my entire family killed in a train wreck, or something truly dire like that. Part of the reason I didn't enact the plan right away when I made it up all those years ago was that it's as close to guaranteed as I can figure out how to make it. Anyway.
A major component of the plan, possibly the most important part, is renting a hotel room. I can't think of anything worse to inflict on people I care about than the horror of finding my corpse in the bathroom. If I care about people, why the hell would I want to put them through that kind of pain?
On the other hand, I've worked as a hotel cleaning person, and I know there were days when finding a body in a bathtub (or a severed ear in a dresser drawer, a la Blue Velvet) would have been - well, not a happy thing exactly, but it would have relived the monotony, as well as probably getting me the rest of the day off with pay. I figure, you may as well give somebody else a bit of excitement on your last day.
Sometimes, I'm damn morbid. ;)