I would like the universe to STOP SUCKING now, thank you.

[baratron]

Dear Miss Helen [0] $My_lastname,

Thank you for your recent application for the Disabled Students' Allowances (DSAs) to assist you with your graduate Diploma in Chemistry.

It would appear from your doctor's letter that your condition [1] is stable with medication [2]. Furthermore, physiotherapy if necessary, is available through the National Health Service with your doctor's referral [3] and asthma and allergies are very common in everyday life [4]. Therefore, it is not clear what you are hoping to get with the Disabled Students Allowances (DSAs) [5].

Please be aware that DSAs are not intended to assist with disability-related expenditure which the student would continue to incur if s/he were not attending her/his course.

Yours sincerely
[elided]
Student Support Manager

[0] There is no person of that name in this house.
[1] Note the singular. Apparently I only have one thing wrong with me?
[2] Or rather, my mental health was stable before I incurred the stress of going back to university. Since then I have done rather more crying in the toilets/in people at college's offices than I would like.
[3] WTF? Physiotherapy? This makes NO SENSE. I have a congenital spinal malformation, the best physiotherapy can do is stop it getting worse.
[4] And even more common in a chemistry lab full of allergens.
[5] Oh, you know, things like:
* A specialist mental health counsellor/mentor to help with my academic study organisation and stress levels.
* A personal assistant to help me in the library and to carry heavy books to and from college for me.
* Additional photocopying expenses needed due to difficulty in handling heavy books.
* A decent back-supporting chair and desk - as the type of chair you need for hours of study is not the same as a comfortable chair for sitting in at home.
* Occasional taxi fares, for when I am too exhausted to manage public transport yet well enough to concentrate on the lecture.
* Additional photocopying expenses needed due to the fact I will miss more lectures than the average person because of illness, and will need to make copies of other people's notes.
...and I haven't even started thinking yet.

What the hell are these morons on?

Yes, I am going to set the college Disability Services Manager on the council (I've spoken to him already), and he is going to KICK RIGHTEOUS ARSE. Nonetheless, I Do Not Need This. Not on top of being sick and stressed and behind with my course. I just don't.

Comments

[a-musing-amazon.livejournal.com]

I suspect part of the problem is their lack of context for you. Most DLA applicants will have been school/college students in the borough and they will therefore be treating it as a continuation of a support problem they have faced before (good LAs were the ones that did get on with arranging the assessment before I saw students at the Uni, when quite often we had no time to help process their DLA and put arrangements in place before the start of teaching). Maybe a lot of their 'non-standard' applicants are 'speculative' and they have just responded on autopilot. Still doesn't excuse their letter to you though.

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